I talk to my dog about boobs
Here’s an excerpt of a piece I wrote for Mamamia on the superficiality of breast implants:
After reading an article a little while ago about women’s superficiality in the matter of breast implants, I became flummoxed, furrowing my brow and scratching my noggin.
Why was it, I thought, that it was deemed superficial for a woman to have breast implants, but not breast reductions?
I found myself acting as a kind of spokesperson to my audience of one (my dog) on behalf of large-breasted women. He (my dog) knows better than anyone how often my short arms just don’t reach around my enormous bosom. “This is no way to live!” I cried out to him as he rolled over for a belly rub, knowing that if I were to bend down I might just topple clean over.