Love

My 300 words a day

I finally have the house to myself. On Monday I will be back in the office. Four long weeks of school holidays behind me, but of course now that the children are with their dad I have the sting of I didn't take them to enough fun

13

Just the two kids, thanks.

In the moments before I woke up this morning, I had a little dream. Two plastic sticks on a table in front of me: on the left, one line; on the right, two lines. A few seconds spent with a new life. When I did blink

6

This is the next chapter

I thought I should keep this in until I was sure I wanted to write it, just in case. You know, history dictates a strong likelihood of pearshapedness. Back in April, I asked Gaz to leave and then I cried for about a week without even

Yes

When I was 19, I was engaged to a man I had known for less time than it took the kettle to boil. We lived together in a tiny flat that backed against the train line and had a courtyard just big enough for the

14

Which day was it?

Was this the day I stopped breastfeeding her and set her up for a lifetime of being the outcome of formula feeding? Was I secretly relieved when the doctor said my medication wasn't compatible with breastfeeding because at least I could get some sleep? Did

2

the worst

"Mornings are the worst," I say. The whole day stretches ahead with no respite in sight. Just hour after hour of wondering why the phone is silent. Watching the sun rise and fall with no solace in the sound of his voice or a curious text

0

Must keep typing

I'm typing because everyone knows what will happen if I don't. I'll pick up the damn phone and I'll press the stupid buttons and have a conversation that doesn't fix anything and then cry until I'm ninety. It wouldn't even be the right conversation. My prediction

2

Writing is broken

It's a funny thing, being too depressed to write. And by 'funny' I mean 'so horrifically unfair and devastating', P.S. I write much better about the sad things when I'm not sad (though it usually takes me a couple of days afterward to feel anything

5

Book Outline

Today, I wrote words on 50 pieces of paper and arranged them in a partially chronological, partially emotional rollercoaster way. I created the outline of my book. I know it is the outline of my book because I wrote "BOOK OUTLINE" on the first page in

0